'Make it so' Laois Gardaí turn to Star Trek to beam up new recruits

A Star Trek themed report of a poor driver by Laois Gardaí went down so well on Facebook that the division is using it to invite new recruits, sticking like Klingons to the trekkie theme.

Enlisting an exasperated Captain Jean Luc Picard to prove their point, the Gardaí earlier this week showed the shocking use of a pair of pliers found connected to an automatic car to keep it moving.

The post was funny but the list of offences was serious, including the driver being "highly intoxicated", an unaccompanied Learner, with no tax and no NCT and driving at 154 kmph on the M7 motorway in Laois.  The car was seized and the driver faces court.

"Captain’s Log, Portlaoise Sector: RPU Sensors detected a Volkswagen Golf attempting warp speed on the M7 yesterday at 154 kph. Orders: Red Alert. Engage Blue Lights. Intercept! Driver arrested. Starship seized. Set new course for Portlaoise District Court. Make it so. Prime Directive: Never ever drink and drive. And if your “Starship” needs a pair of pliers to engage, it should never go to warp 9".

The reaction was brilliant, with many engaging their favourite Star Trek quotes. 

An Garda Síochana Kilkenny got in on the fun saying "you're lucky it wasn't using a cloaking device, those Romulans can be tricky to catch."

"Great stuff lads (from a long-term Trekkie). Glad you caught the b***ard, because he could have done another roaduser a lot of damage, or injury, at that speed. And fair dues to whoever is in your division that knows his Star Trek lore so well. Qupla' (he will know what I mean..)," one commenter said.

"Well done lads, not just for catching the idiot, but good PR too!! Sounds like the driver was trying to boldly go where no driver has gone before," another said.

"Must have been out of his F. Vulcan Mind!! - Warp core could have been ejected!" another said.

Keeping the craic at warp speed, Laois Gardaí are now enlisting new recruits to the job in intergalactic style. 

"Attention all Starfleet enthusiasts, Klingons, Vulcans, and earthlings alike! Are you ready to boldly go where few have gone before? To serve, protect, and explore the frontiers of peace and public safety? Then consider joining An Garda Síochána — where logic (Vulcans), bravery (Klingons), and curiosity (humans) are always in demand.

"Job Title: Peacekeeper, Community Hero, Galactic Diplomat (a.k.a. Garda). What we seek: The calmness of Spock. The courage of Kirk. The loyalty of Chekov. The sense of humour of Worf. The patience of a Starfleet counsellor.

"No transporter accidents. No time-travel paradoxes. Just real, meaningful work.

"Why you — yes, YOU (Trekkie or not) — should apply: You already know how to follow protocol — you’re halfway there. You believe in justice — you’d make a great constable on any planet. You can defuse conflict with calm words (or at least try diplomacy before phasers).

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"You love teamwork — from the bridge to the beat. And you might even get your own mission patch (no dilithium crystals required). Join the ranks. Protect your community. Explore new frontiers of public service.

"Apply now — and may your career in An Garda Síochána live long and prosper," Laois Garda end.